Last week I was in Russia (Pskov and Petersburg AHHHAHSDFHAD) on a study trip, and when we were in the most amazing supermarket of all time that was exacty like the Home Depot of food I decided I had to buy this instant coffee, which I surmised would be astoundingly and fantastically terrible. (The company is MOSCOW COFFEE. And then some more words that I don’t understand.) There were a lot of other kinds, including one that had the Eiffel Tower on it, but I decided to go for the less-good-looking one. So.
I’m writing this before tasting the coffee, because I’m a little worried that things will Never Be The Same, and not in a good way, after I drink it. The coffee particles look a lot like dried wood chips, a la the ending of Fargo. They are a very strange color. Some of them look like coffee, some of them look entirely not like coffee. The smell is not un-coffee-like, however. It has that slightly acidic smell that some kinds of coffee have. (I am hesitant to compare it to anything because that just seems mean.) Fuck, the water finished boiling. My fate is nigh.